Orlando, Fla. (Ivanhoe Newswire) — September is Suicide Prevention Month. Last year, nearly 49,300 Americans died by suicide, and the CDC says more than 13 million adults seriously considered suicide. Mental health experts say one of the biggest warning signs isn’t always what people say, it may be what they stop saying.
Every day people go to work. They smile. They tell everyone, “I’m fine.” But inside, they may believe the people they love would be better off without them.
“They’re not saying anything. And what we know is that this actually compounds those feelings, their sense of disconnection and makes things worse,” said Colette Fehr, Licensed Mental Health Counselor.
For many people, the silence isn’t about not wanting help. It’s about believing they don’t deserve it. They worry they’re a burden. They often hide their pain, they may say they’re “fine,” or act like everything is okay even when they’re struggling inside.
“Culturally, expectations that a lot of people grow up that if you’re sharing what you’re going through, you’re burdening people. Some people feel shame around admitting what they’re feeling,” explained Fehr.
That sense of shame and disconnection can increase suicide risk. The CDC lists feeling like a burden as one of the warning signs that someone may need help.
So how do you reach someone who doesn’t want to reach out? Experts say don’t try to fix everything. Instead, simply show up, invite them to take a walk, grab a cup of coffee, share a meal. Sometimes the simple act of being present can help someone feel less alone.
You don’t have to have all the answers. Listening may be the most important thing you can do because you may never know what someone is carrying but reminding them they matter could make all the difference.
Mental health experts say one of the most important things you can do is listen more than you talk. Try to resist the urge to immediately offer advice or compare their experience to your own. If you or someone you know is in crisis, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline anytime.
Contributors to this news report include: Cliff Tumetel, Producer; Bob Walko, Editor.
Sources:
https://www.cdc.gov/mental-health/about-data/suicidal-thoughts-and-behavior.html
https://www.yourtango.com/self/phrases-people-say-when-theyre-miserable-dont-want-admit-it
https://www.stonybrookmedicine.edu/patientcare/askexpert/suicidalthoughts/marriott/mahaffey
https://prairie-care.com/resources/type/blog/depression-support/
https://www2.hse.ie/mental-health/helping-someone-else/what-to-say/
