Orlando, Fla. (Ivanhoe Newswire) — It’s National Bullying Prevention Month. A report shows one in five students say they’ve been bullied. But experts warn there’s another form of bullying, one that’s far harder to recognize.
From kids on the playground, to teens in the hallway. Bullying is everywhere, in person and online. One study found 26 percent of middle school students experienced bullying compared to just under 15 percent of high schoolers.
“What their brains are accustomed to is tearing other people down,” said Colette Fehr, Licensed Mental Health Counselor.
But have you heard of soft bullying?
“Soft bullying is when you give backhanded compliments, you leave somebody out, you make a jab at them, but it’s sort of disguised like a backhanded compliment,” explained Fehr.
Experts say you can spot it through flattery used to lower your guard, constantly finding fault, or excluding you from conversations. Also, pay attention to body language such as eye rolls and sighs that are meant to embarrass.
“If we feel left out, we experience that like a threat in our body, and it causes pain that looks the same on a brain scan as physical pain,” said Fehr.
If you’re a victim, psychologist Colette Fehr says the key is to act and set boundaries. If a comment leaves you second-guessing yourself, don’t be afraid to call them out on it.
“You keep giving me compliments that feel like backhanded compliments. Is something going on that we need to discuss? And most of the time, bullies really don’t have any courage, and they’ll deflate,” explained Fehr.
And whether it’s subtle or obvious, experts say one thing is true: standing up to bullies takes away their power.
Experts also warn to watch for other signs of soft bullying, like being purposely ignored, set up to fail, or kept out of crucial information. Spotting it is the first step to stopping it.
Contributors to this news report include: Cliff Tumetel, Producer; Bob Walko, Editor.
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Sources:
https://www.pacer.org/bullying/info/stats/
https://ridersminds.org/bullying/#:~:text=’SOFT’%20BULLYING,a%20long%20period%20of%20time