Love Online: Digital Attraction
ORLANDO, Fla. (Ivanhoe Broadcast News) -- One of the most daunting tasks of online dating is creating a profile. Do you describe yourself in a flattering way or does that come off as too egotistical? Whether you are already an active online dater or a rookie, there are steps you can take to improve your profile. Here’s how to play and win at the game of love online.
All right. Let’s start with the basics. First, create a profile. Popular sites like Match.com, Date.com or Jdate.com ask daters to begin by answering multiple-choice questions about geography, age range and physical features. Then daters write an essay.
Eve Hogan, a relationship advisor on DreamMates.com, says, “That’s the part that I think is most important because that’s the part where your own personality shines through.” She says the more you say about yourself, the better your results will be. “Be specific. People often say things like, ‘Oh, I’m just looking for someone to spend romantic evenings with.’ But what does a romantic evening mean to you?”
She says your profile can really help you see what is and is not important to you in a mate. From there, it’s easier to describe the person you want. “I really want the other person to be able to say, ‘She’s talking about me’ and have her describe the man she’s looking for,” Hogan says.
Judy Silverstein, co-author of “Online Dating for Dummies” says keep your profile positive. She says: “You don’t want to talk about how you’re embarrassed to do this. Everyone else is doing it.”
Next step, choose your user name. Hogan says, “I’ve seen women write ‘Sexybaby’ as their user name and then they write me emails and say things like ‘Eve, I just don’t get it. These guys are all dogs.’”
“You should probably use a screen name that gives a good sense of your identity,” says Silverstein. She says that could include things like where you’re from or hobbies. And when in doubt, use a variation of your name.
The most critical part of your profile, according to Silverstein, is your photo. Experts say profiles with photos are 10-times more likely to get a response than those without. As with the profiles, there are dos and don’ts. Hogan says: “I’ve seen people post things with their wedding picture where they’ve cut out the spouse. That’s not the best way to do it.” Do use close-up, natural-looking pictures of just you. And use a recent photo. Don’t use glamour shots.
LookBetterOnline.com is one of many new companies helping online daters put their best face forward. After you’ve built a great profile, Silverstein says one of the most important keys to success is to be proactive. “Don’t wait to be called or contacted, do it yourself,” she says.
Enjoy the hunt and don’t forget to shop around for the characteristics you want.
Most sites cost between $25 and $30 a month. Join Silverstein and her co-author -- and fiancé -- Michael Lasky for a special love online discussion room throughout the month of February at Ivanhoe.com. Silverstein and Hogan both recommend using a site with some fee involved because that usually helps weed out the people who either aren’t serious about starting a relationship or who may be a threat to you.
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